Yesterday, I attended my first meeting for a local chapter of the Mothers of Twins Club. Besides their monthly meeting for all members, they have bi-monthly informal meetings for new and expectant parents of twins. This meeting happens to be in the middle of the day, so I took some time off of work to see what it was all about.
There were 10 women and a dad in attendance - 2 of us were expectant mothers and the rest were new moms/dads. The gal sitting next to me was the other expectant mom and was scheduled for her C-section in 5 days. She is a small-sized woman and I almost gasp in horror and anticipated discomfort to see how big she is. She is more square than round and I am sure that her ribs are expanded near the breaking point. There isn't an inch in her torso that isn't used by her babies. I silently wonder if my longer back might help me, should I be as lucky to go to term. All but one mom gave birth at California Pacific Medical Center, the same hospital we are planning to use, and they absolutely rave about it. One of my questions to the group was how many actually made it to term (37 weeks) and how many needed the C-section. Most fell under the 37 weeks, but the earliest was only 35 weeks - not too scary. All but 2 women had C-sections, although the moderator assured me that the statistic was really more like half. Other questions brought up were lactation and feeding questions, how much help to accept questions, horror stories about well-meaning, but un-educated advise or demands of non-twin or non-moms, advise on scheduling, sleeping, and helpful gagets that are "have-to"s with twins.
The truly valuable part to me at this point, however, was just sitting there for 2 hours and watching 8 sets of twins and their moms be happy, content and productive. The proof that even after 4 weeks, mothers with twins can have a "normal" life - get out of the house, visit with people and still get changed, fed, and have all their other needs met. It will take a lot more observation and sharing of ideas and schedules (time management and scheduling are the core of success, it seems), and I look forward to spending more time in groups like this with women who are already in the trenches. Although all moms have admitted to crying everyday for the first couple of weeks, there does seem to be hope that this might just be workable without a full-blown emotional breakdown.
